How to Shop Like Royalists

My American friend Skyped me a few weeks back and a hot topic of our conversation was the upcoming royal wedding. Like many Americans, he had been swept away by the romance and fairytale idea of such an occasion and was sure to catch all the live footage from the day.

Naively, he assumed that as a Brit, my life would grind to a halt to accept a new royal into our country’s monarchy. At first, I laughed off his suggestion but then I had a terrifying realisation. Our country was slowly being swept up in royal wedding fever. The evidence? The array of wedding-themed memorabilia that filled our shops’ shelves and the numerous street party invites I had received. Like it or not, our country was getting ready for a celebration.

No sooner had Prince William and Kate Middleton announced their engagement back in November than stores across the UK descended into a royal memorabilia panic.

The frenzy began when Kate Middleton wowed photographers at the engagement announcement in her midnight blue Issa dress. Overnight, the frock became a wardrobe must-have and despite the £385 price tag, it promptly sold out. Cottoning on to the demand, high street stores threw themselves into a panic, desperate to create replicas.

Tesco created the ‘Kate’ dress for £25, Lipsy offered theirs for a reasonable £45 with the option to pre-order and Peacocks stayed true to their affordable fashion mantra with a stunning £14 style and a waiting list aptly named ‘Waity Katie’.

Yet it’s not just fashion that has been given the royal treatment. Amongst the traditional royal memorabilia of dining plates and Union Jack themed products lie a selection of absurd potential purchases. Relive the days of your childhood with a Dress-up Dolly’s book that allows you to play stylist to Kate and Wills and create your own version of the ceremony for just £5.99. Neal’s Yard have gotten into the spirit with their own romance massage oil. At this rate, it won’t just be Kate and Wills in for a romantic evening…

But our favourite item of memorabilia has to be the Royal Wedding-themed condoms. Yes, you read that correctly. Just because you are a royalist, doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy a bit of hanky panky. Thankfully, the condoms are for decoration only. This is actually more bizarre as we can’t begin to think who would buy condoms for decorative purposes only. Still, it brings a whole new meaning to the phrase, ‘Lie back and think of England.’

Image by americanistadechiapas courtesy of Flickr