Wine Tasting at South Bank’s Vinopolis

I like the name Vinopolis – sounds Bacchic. Hmmm, yes, oh, I’m getting: randy fauns, burbling red juices; ooh…bosoms, yes. Fig leaves, and…a little touch of sin! Delightful! Proclaim it, go on: Vinopolis! City of wine! Blessed Mother of the ancient fountain! Source of the celestial stream!

When I actually walked past, however, before I could get too carried away with my fertility rites (fortunately perhaps), the shivery, incontinent weather at London Bridge sent me inside.

Despite my excitement about the name, this was actually my first visit. For although I had walked past before, I wasn’t exactly sure what it was, and thought it looked a little reserved, or corporate, or something, and hadn’t ventured inside. Turns out it’s a giant boozer, centred around a wine tour and tasting rooms, and actually very unpretentious.

Basically, you pay, get some tokens and exchange them for drink. At the beginning you get an introduction to how to taste wine properly, and then the action is to be found in wandering through a series of cavernous chambers, choosing various wines to taste, and taking notes (maybe).

Wine tastings can sound like fusty affairs, ghastly esoteric meetings where you blindly nod along with some nonsense you are supposed to be registering about burnt kumquat, fed to you by a supercilious berk in a gold brocade waistcoat. And although there are, no doubt, things to be said for tutored tastings, there is much to be said for a more self-guided approach, too: walking round you get to take time to sit down, at your own pace, and make your own mind up, a bit like reading the book before seeing the film; no pressure.

We tried a few nice, a few ok, and a couple of horrid wines, before following our tokens to the gin bar for a cocktail, and finally, a little the worse for wear, the rum bar (gratuitous – I still prefer it in cocktails, might try the Champagne or beer next time). The staff were only moderately informed and moderately helpful, but it’s the kind of place where you’re mostly off on your own anyway, and though I didn’t think the premium section was particularly exciting, the general idea is good fun.

One last thing that struck me was the presence of vending machines around the place; sullen, ungraceful creatures, all menacing coils and trapping mouth, they looked a bit out of place in a swimming pool, let alone a winery, and I almost got snobbish – until I realised they were ideal, did a little jig, and bought three packets of crisps for 50p each. It’s not that they don’t have proper food in there, just they’re relaxed enough to forget the old conservative strictures surrounding wine, and that’s what it’s all about.

The Grapevine tour costs £19.50 (rum tasting £3.50 extra for three tastings).

Vinopolis
1 Bank End
South Bank
SE1 9BU

Tel: 0207 940 8300